Of all the things that my clients have the most issues with, it is texting. They understand all the things I have to say, but they find the texting bit so hard to put into practice!
Texting is my thing. I text everyone, so why can’t I just text the guy I like whenever I want to and as quickly as I want to?
Why is it so important to wait?
So, here I go again with one of my analogies…
Dating can be like dieting. You love chocolate cake, it’s your favourite food and you don’t want to give it up to lose weight. You can’t imagine not having chocolate cake, but in the long run it can interfere with achieving your goals.
I think we all know what would happen if you kept eating chocolate cake when trying to get to your goal weight. Chocolate cake probably won’t help your progress.
Would you feel anxious after you eat it and perhaps a little regretful too? Even though it tasted and felt amazing at the time?
Eventually you may get to your goal weight despite the cake but the journey would be so much harder. Wouldn’t an option be to wait until you get to your goal weight and then slowly reintroduce the chocolate cake and have a small piece at a time?
Isn’t the short term pain (giving up the chocolate cake) worth the long term gain (having the great body)? The same idea applies to texting.
Would you be better off to wait to reply to texts and not text first? When you always text first, it is chasing the guy and puts you in a position of feeling anxious if he doesn’t text back/takes a long time to reply. Girls, please don’t go through this unnecessary anxiety! Let him do the chasing.
Texting back immediately is tempting, but it can give the impression that you wait by your phone or you don’t have other interesting things going on. So, next time you have the desire to text a guy, ask yourself how is this going to help the future of the relationship? Just like a dieter should ask, how will this chocolate cake help me reach my goal weight?
Some simple guidelines are….
Wait at Least 30 Minutes to Text Back
Give yourself a chance to read the text, absorb what it says and think clearly for an appropriate response, rather than an instant knee jerk reaction. Once you send the text, it is too late to change your mind. Take your time.
Let Him Text You First
If he wants to contact you, he will. If he wants to ask you out, he’ll ask. No need to remind him you are still alive.
No Need to Answer Every Message
Sometimes guys just want to tell you something without necessarily waiting for a text back. If there’s no question in the text from him, no need to respond.
Don’t Read Too Much Into Texting as an Indication of How He Feels About You
If he is really interested in getting to know you for a serious relationship, he will ask you out on a date, not just a text fest to nowhere.